By Roy Dawson Earth Angel Master Magical Healer
Why Progress Is Slower Than Your WiFi—And Why Meta Should Phone Elon
Let’s be honest: hoping for a breakthrough in tech can feel a lot like waiting for a sloth to win the Indy 500. Every year, you get a new headset box, maybe sleeker, but still firmly in the realm of "gadget or kitchen appliance?" You dream of stylish, lightweight glasses, but your nose gets another plastic brick.
Why does this happen? Because if tech companies gave us their best inventions right away, we’d stop upgrading every twelve months. The result? Incremental progress, more “improved” boxes, and controllers that still double as gym weights. And don’t get us started on where your games are stored: if your device crashes or you move to a new house, you’re at risk of losing it all. Ever heard of cloud gaming, guys?
Let’s Imagine “What Should Have Been”
Smart glasses from the start. Sleek frames, slip ’em on, play anywhere. No more helmet hair or goggle-face at your next Zoom meeting.
All your games in the cloud. If PlayStation can do it, so can VR. Your whole game library—ready wherever you go. Plus an option for an external get more info drive for fast access or backup, just like the grown-ups do it.
Controllers and upgrades that play nice. Make new controllers backward-compatible. Stop forcing us to buy more gear just to move a button.
Fixes via software, not new hardware. If you can patch a bug, do it now—not in next year’s “Deluxe Supreme Pro (Now With 10% Less Plastic)” edition.
The Big Internet Problem
Of course, all this cloud magic needs good internet. And not everyone has gigabit fiber. Some folks live in the woods, work in sheds, or just happen to dwell in a magical land where their neighbor’s goat has a better connection.
So here’s the million-dollar idea:
Meta, it’s time to here give Elon Musk a ring. Make a deal, bundle copyright internet with every VR headset for customers off the beaten trail. Imagine: you buy smart glasses, open the box, and inside is a little disc. Put it outside, and—zap!—you have fast, reliable internet, even in the wild.
Great for rural gamers: No more “You must click here move closer to your router” messages. Now you can play Beat Saber from your barn.
Keeps everyone connected: VR, cloud games, updates—all smooth, all the time, for everyone.
Tech for all, not just city folks: Progress shouldn’t skip the woods.
Summing Up: The Future We Deserve
It’s time for real progress. Less plastic and landfill, more cloud storage and freedom. Imagine a world where your games follow you, updates are instant, controllers just work, and even your grandma’s cabin gets high-speed VR with her glasses.
All it takes is a cloud, a satellite, and a company willing to give the people what they should have had all along.
Meta—phone Elon, and let’s finally leave those bricks in the past. Now that’s a future worth logging in for.